Day 14 –
Rock Climbing and Rappelling
February 13, 2008
Submitted by Pat
Today dawns overcast and never completely clears. After breakfast of oatmeal, eggs, pancakes, bacon and fresh fruit, we pack up and start the hike back down to the river across from Cave Camp. We still have to get across the river and today we cross the river by holding on to two straps attached to a zip line, taking a running start, flying out over the river, letting go, falling into the water, and swimming to shore. If the sun had been out I probably would have felt much happier about the whole thing, but it’s overcast and cool and the idea of dropping 30 feet into cold water and swimming to shore just doesn’t appeal. Of course I do it anyway and manage to make it to shore.
As a reward, I immerse myself in the stone hot tub that is close to the landing area. The tub comfortably holds 6 people and is made from a natural indentation in the rock that has been created by river water running over the rock for hundreds, if not thousands, of years. There’s a submersible wood stove that heats the water and I really can’t tell you how good it felt to ease in after the chill of the river dunking. When we finally warm up, we head back to our cliff dwellings, change into rock climbing clothes and meet at the cave for lunch.
It’s too dark inside the cave for me and the mood I’m in so I sit outside. Sitting around after we finish eating and waiting to head out for the climb is hard. Anticipation is hard. The whole group is quiet – some had never rock climbed or rappelled before. Everyone is kind of lost in their own thoughts. Finally after enough time has passed to allow Chula and Peter to set up the climbing ropes, Aaron leads us on a short 15 minute walk to the base of the rock climbing area.
At this point I don’t realize it but Aaron is sick with some kind of intestinal flu. He doesn’t appear sick but while he’s setting up the belay rope he disappears without saying anything except, “Be back in a few minutes.” Fifteen minutes later he returns and continues with his safety lecture and instructions on how to rope up, put on the harness, and the commands to use when climbing. Rayno, our videographer, shows us the best climbing techniques for the pitches that have been chosen for us. I feel nervous and energized. I look at the climb and want so badly to do it without fear. Nancy is petrified. She is barely able to verbalize her fear. I don’t probe but stand by quietly. I know she is scared and I know she can do it and I know she has to do it alone.
Don goes first of the three of us. He looks strong on the climb although I know this isn’t his favorite activity. But he does it and eventually climbs out of sight. Nancy tells me to go first, but I really want to go last this time and I want to be there to encourage her whether she can hear or receive me or not. She ropes up, yells, “On belay” Aaron responds with, “Belay on” Then she yells, “Climbing” and Aaron says, “Climb on”. The first move is a very difficult one for someone with short legs – it’s a perfect move for someone with long legs and good upper body strength. I can’t really describe it except to say that you have jump up and push yourself up onto the rock ledge using just your arms. Nancy struggles but doesn’t give up and eventually gets up onto the ledge. She moves up to the spot where she uses arms and legs to get up a vertical wall and disappears from view. Then it’s my turn.
I rope up and begin. Because I’m last, I feel hurried and I don’t take the time to really complete the first move smoothly. I make it up – it just isn’t pretty. Then up to the next belay – here Peter picks up the belay and asks if I’m a rock climber. I say not really and he says there are two ways to get up – a series of foot and hand holds that have been anchored into the smooth rock face or a more technical way up natural rock with limited hand and foot holds. He urges me to give the hard one a try and I say, sure. He shows me the best hand and foot holds and off I go. Wow – it’s hard. He makes it look easy, but for someone like me who has limited (no) technical rock climbing experience it’s pretty daunting. I manage to get most of the way up before I have to cheat a little and use one of the man made foot holds. I’m glad that I tried and glad to be up and I know that despite the desire and the will my 53 year old body doesn’t have the raw, untrained skill or strength to just do it anymore.
At the top we climb out onto what is called the Knife Edge. A steel cable is bolted into the rock and we are clipped in to our climbing harness via a strap and a carabiner that moves along the cable as we walk across the thin rock edge. It isn’t as frightening as I expect – one side is a sheer drop off and the other side drops off more gradually. But when I turn around and look back and see the cliff the guides are prepping for the rappel, I feel all my hard-won confidence evaporate. The bottom of my stomach drops out and I feel the insidious paralysis of deep fear creep over me. I have to look away or my will would have been siphoned off until I am left a gibbering idiot, unable to go down and unable to down climb via the rock climbing side.
The sky is grey, the wind has picked up, and an occasional sprinkle dampens our enthusiasm. Slowly we creep off the Knife Edge and up to the rappel tower. Nancy, Don and I go first. It must have been intentional because I feel like I just can’t stand up there and watch everyone go down this time. I was last up the climb so when Aaron looks at me and gestures toward the rope, I step forward. Once I have something to concentrate on, Aaron’s calm instructions, his careful efforts to connect me to the main rope and the belay line, and his final words, “Okay, now spread your legs shoulder width and step backward. All the way to the edge. That’s it. Now lean back, further, further, and walk backwards down the cliff. You have total control of how fast you go. Have fun. You can do this.” I look back at my friends who are looking at me with stark faces and step back out of sight.
I felt like I was on the moon, bounding down a sheer cliff. I’m able to get the “feel” for how much rope to let off and I can literally jump backward and down, release line, and time it for my return to the cliff, like you see the pros do on TV. I feel comfortable and calm and confident in the equipment and finally in myself. I look around and the blood returns to my head and I stop shaking. This is incredible! I’m doing it. Wow.
Because it’s a 300 foot rappel and the rope is only long enough to do half the rappel, I am guided by Peter down to a small metal platform that has been bolted into the rock where he waits to change the rope and belay lines so I can finish the rest of the rappel. His voice guides me down and his calm instructions allow me to stand there and accept his ministrations – changing the ropes and finally telling me to step over the edge of the platform to my right and take the weight again. It’s awkward because there’s a cable covered by a burlap sack that’s right where I want to put my feet. So I do a little hop to get over it and in the clear.
The rest of the rappel is wonderful, and my fear disappears as I continue down. No one is at the bottom when I arrive so based on Peter’s instructions I disconnect the belay rope (leaving the carabiner attached) and unhook the special rappel clip from the main rope. I’m down. Standing in the jungle looking up at this huge 300 foot tower I wait for the next person to appear. I take off my helmet and harness and take out Nancy’s camera so I can record Don and Nancy’s descents.
Several minutes pass before I see Nancy slowly back her way over the cliff edge. I know she’s scared. This isn’t a fun thing for her and I don’t think it’s going to get easier the farther down she rappels – although I’m hoping. Her body looks tight and her movements are anxious and small as she edges her way down to Peter’s platform. With my neck craned in an unnatural upward looking position, I videotape and listen to her as she is transferred to the next rope. As she steps off the platform, she struggles with the canvas covered cable, stops, and says something to Peter like, “Please don’t drop me.” It’s a raw, pure, savage and open moment of fear. I have felt like that before and known that terror. I want to do something to help but know that this is her terror and her moment and all I can do is cheer her on and be there at the bottom when she arrives.
With a few hearty yells of encouragement, I talk her down and help unhook her from the ropes. She’s down, she made it, and she has rappelled a 300 foot cliff. Wow! I’m sure she feels relief but is so jazzed from the fear that it takes time to come down and find her way back to herself. I help her out of her harness and start filming Don’s descent. There’s nothing I can do to ease her way back to herself except to be there.
Don does a great job. He looks relaxed after the initial drop over the edge, and moves quickly and easily down the rock face. Here is a man who is not comfortable with heights, and the first thing he says on touchdown was, “Wow – that was incredible! I want to do it again.” I’m elated that he has a good experience. It makes him feel good although he can’t understand why it is a great experience when his fear of heights is real. But he lets it go and revels in the confidence and warmth of having done something very difficult and challenging and come out the other side having actually enjoyed the activity. What a difference between joy and fear!
As the afternoon wears on, the rest of the group rappels down. At one point we see Laura start down and then stop and get pulled back up. What’s that about? When Kate came down she told us that Laura had fallen, twisting onto her left side and slamming into the rock because her feet were too close together and her body acted like a pendulum. Turns out she bruised her ribs and struggles to decide how to get down. Aaron convinces her that rappelling is going to be easier than down climbing so she clips onto the rope and slowly makes her way down, unable to use her left side and relying on Aaron and then Peter to help lower her down.
Once back at camp, Laura’s husband Barry, a physician, checks her ribs and can’t find evidence of obvious fractures, so he gives her some Motrin and she eases her battered body into the hot tub for a long soak. All of us check out the hot tub. It feels great and Don is elated by his success and wanting to understand how he was able to have so much fun at an activity that would normally have terrified him. Nancy is still processing her fear. And the hot water helps us all.
Nancy goes for a massage and I take a shower. Once back in my dwelling and dressed in warmer clothes, I wrap myself in my sleeping bag and write in my journal. The rain starts coming down in earnest and I watch it through the opening. The area hadn’t seen any significant rain in a long time so this rain is a blessing.
Later I head to the cave for dinner and join the group for another meal. Peter tells us that Aaron is sick and might not show up for his nightly talk about the next day’s activities. But he does join us briefly and then heads back to his dwelling with a pitcher of tea and some Gatorade. We sit around the fire afterward and talk until it grows dark. I’m tired and the day has been full so I go to my dwelling and seek out the bliss of sleep.